My dreams came true...
Times 5!! (Thank you God).
BUT...
No where in those dreams did I ever see that children would create such a "busy life". I could never have imagined when I was a little girl wishing to be a mommy that my days would be so full of EVERYTHING kids!!!
I'm not going to blame my children.
I'll just blame my husband! ;-) (lol)
Some moms are really good at their job.
Maybe they have a great calendar to rely on (I try),
Maybe they plan out their weekly menus (I try),
Maybe they don't need a weekly salary beyond hugs and kisses (oh, how I wish),
Lately I feel like I am just throwing money this direction and that direction.
Not just in the kids direction, but into our house in that seems to want to fall apart at the worst possible time, root canals (mine-OUCH!), increased medical and prescription co-pays (yes, I am thankful that we have health insurance, but OUCH again), etc...
I need to FIND ME A JOB THAT PAYS (money)!!!
BUT...
REALITY sets in and I realize ...
I have SO MANY restrictions (because of the kids and Mike's schedule). My kids need me (some more than others) and not "ME" but the services (aka taxi-driver and homework helper) that I provide. Besides, I haven't had a "real" job in 12 years and my resume is pretty pitiful (OUCH AGAIN!!)
I know people around me are sick and tired about hearing about my "job woes". I go back and forth about it ALL the time. The thought that I have been out of the job world for so long is daunting and the thought of how to squeeze a job into the middle of everything else is beyond overwhelming!
I KNOW (in my heart) that I need to be content that God knows I am exactly where I am supposed to be.
But it's hard.
I need a good sense of direction right now.
I need to breathe in and breathe out ... knowing that each day will come and go.
And remind myself...
"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." (Matthew 6:34)
